Friday, August 14, 2009

Long Suffering

So, this morning, I had the opportunity to "establish my heart" by expressing patience in a difficult situation (James 5). Nine years ago, in the midst of an incredibly challenging trial, I was given a book on prayer that has become the foundation of my prayer life. Because it has become so important to me, I have done the very best to preserve this book...that is, up until this morning. Well, as I was engaged in my "beach chair prayer" enjoying the beauty of God's presence and creation, with my prayer book in hand, the blessing that I so often find in a cup Starbucks coffee quickly turned into a horrifying curse as it found its way all over my handbook to prayer! It wasn't my fault...never is, right?:) In that instant, my patience was put to the test. I utterly failed. Offering a few choice words with reserved gusto to the listening trees, I brought upon myself the ever-so-familiar experience of the conviction of the Holy Spirit and the resulting confession of my ugly sin. What does it say about a person that can, in one instant, be worshipping the Creator God with Psalm 104, and in the next instant blowing his top?

Here is the painful conclusion. It wasn't the words uttered that hurt my Savior, but the black speck of impatience that continues to stain my heart. "Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks." Luke 6:45

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